OK, so my youngest child turned 18 this week, and now all of my children are officially "adults." Ouch! That hurts in one way, but is deeply beautiful and satisfying in so many other ways.
From a mom who has now "been there," my number one bit of advice to mothers of small children is: Enjoy them while you can. Spend time with them while they are still in your home. Examine your schedule, drop the junk, and seek out time to laugh with your kids, talk to them, shape their hearts and minds.
Just BE with them.
You will never get the precious years of childhood back -- ever. Do what you can to truly "parent" the precious children God has put in your care.
I'm so very grateful that before my children were born God placed it on my husband's and my heart to make them a top priority in our lives. Before money, careers, fancy houses and fancy vacations, our children came before everything else but our relationship with God and each other.
That's not to say there weren't times when we got over busy; there were plenty of those times! But, somehow, we were always able to recognize when work or volunteering got in the way, and -- thank God -- we were able to scale back and focus on the essential ingredient in parenthood: our children.
Since the month our only daughter turning 18 happens to coincide with one release of the very best books ever written about raising girls, I decided to make Bringing up Girls the focus of the Culture Challenge of the Week:
Culture Challenge of the Week: Bringing up Girls
This week my little girl -- and, youngest child -- becomes an adult. It is a strange feeling to suddenly become the mother of only adult children -- an odd transition that no one says much about, but is one of many monumental and emotional passages that comprise the "empty nest" era.
As Kristin turns 18 and prepares to leave our home for college, I am overwhelmed with gratitude -- so deeply thankful -- that God picked me to be her mommy.
She has always been a delightful child, and I am so proud of the woman she has become. A stellar student, a joyful human being, thoughtful and warm, and at once both out-going and humble.
Kristin is a mother’s dream come true.
I marvel that even in the midst of a culture that brainwashes so many girls to flaunt their sexual power, focus on selfish desires, and throw traditional morality and chastity to the wind, Kristin has managed to see through the lies and discover what is highest and best. Please know that although I have spent many hours in prayer over my little girl and have done my very best to teach her to challenge the culture and to tower above the darkness, it is Kristin -- not me -- who has chosen her life path. I thank God every day that she has chosen well. That she has chosen Him.
The great heartbreak is that our nation’s little girls are in danger, and many of them are ill-equipped to realize it.
Dr. James Dobson, author of the new book, Bringing up Girls, describes the many disturbing threats and behaviors that mark this generation of young women. Among them: "A rising incidence of eating disorders, including anorexia and bulimia," cutting and self-mutilation, sexual aggression, binge drinking, and a growing trend of middle class girls to strip and even perform sex acts for cash.
Through the years, Dr. Dobson’s advice has helped me raise Kristin. I’ve read and listened to his teachings throughout my parenthood. And, I’m so grateful -- on behalf of other parents and their little girls too -- that Dr. Dobson has now compiled years of research and experience into one practical handbook to ensure that more girls reach their full potential and become women known for their sterling character and goodness. I’m also grateful that he is continuing to share his wonderful wisdom on the air through his new radio show, Family Talk, which he is co-hosting with his fine son, Ryan. (You can learn more at www.MyFamilyTalk.com)
How to Save Your Daughter
Dr. Dobson and his lovely wife, Shirley, are two of my all time favorite heroes.
In addition to serving as mentors and counselors to millions around the world through the powerful ministries they have led -- including Focus on the Family and the National Day of Prayer -- they succeeded in applying the principles they preach to raising their own inspiring and wonderful daughter, Danae. Although I’ve spent years researching and writing about parenting, family and cultural issues, I still marvel at the unique insights, timeless wisdom and practical help Dr. Dobson continues to offer parents. Bringing up Girls: Practical advice and encouragement for those shaping the next generation of women is a masterpiece, containing a treasure trove of advice and encouragement.
If you have daughters, nieces, granddaughters, or female cousins; if you work with girls in any way; Bringing up Girls can help you help them succeed in every area of their lives. Dr. Dobson opens the book by giving us a peek into the female nature, teaching us to appreciate what he calls "The Wonderful World of Girls." He has chapters on the unique, powerful, and different influences that fathers and mothers have on their little girls, and teaches how you can build a close relationship with your own.
He tackles controversial issues like "The Obsession with Beauty," "Bullies, Buddies, and Best Friends," and dedicates an entire chapter to the toughest and most common questions facing parents of girls. Most of all, Dr. Dobson inspires parents to love their daughters enough to take the time to connect with them, to be involved in their lives, and to dare to question the status quo.
As my own daughter prepares to enter adulthood as an honorable, giving, loving human being, my hat goes off to Dr. James Dobson for providing the tools parents need to help their little girls leave home that way too. Yes, your daughter will ultimately choose her own path, but Bringing Up Girls equips you to help her clearly see the right one.
If you read this newsletter on a regular basis, then you can probably tell that one of my great privileges is to promote people and ideas and organizations that help you succeed in this great adventure called, "parenthood." My desire is to help you strengthen your relationship with your children, grow their faith in God, and equip them to tower above the pop culture. I also want to give you and your friends encouragement each week.
Please take a few minutes to forward this e-mail to five people you know -- pastors, youth workers, teachers, friends -- anyone who has children in their life! Let them know they can receive it for free each week in their own inbox just by taking one minute to sign up at www.HowToSaveYourFamily.com.
Thank you, and have a blessed week!
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