Infidelity

Yeesh - I read this and thought I probably sound like my grandparents did when my parents went through the 60's . (shhhh, don't point out I am a product of the 60's free love!) I am becoming a crotchety old woman of an older generation. I guess I'm arriving.

News shocker! One more politician stepped out on his marriage. The question today on the radio was - should he be burned in the media and should he continue to serve this country - because does the cheating really effect his ability to do his job? This is a "private" matter and it happens all the time, "in every neighborhood". This blog is not about any moral issues of infidelity but about the question as to the standard a politician, public official or someone in leadership should be held to.

This week there have a been a few issues of adult behavior on the radio. Repeatedly this one issue comes to mind for me -

We are raising children. Are you? As parents, we spend a good amount of time trying to educate ourselves in dealing with the kids effectively and positively. Have you ever heard the term "good choice"? Maybe, "consequence". Maybe "consequence" that follows term "choice"? How, as a child today, do they look at the adults that lead our country, whether it's government, entertainment, sports - and come to the conclusion that this lesson of consequences in relation to choices, is relevant? Usually, the teaching is good consequence to good choice/behavior, negative consequence to poor choice/behavior. The unwanted or negative consequence (citation, jail, death, punishment, etc) is the deterrent to breaking laws, drugs, "poor" behavior. But, the US society today, tolerance for everyone and everything means the excuse of "it happens everywhere" (everyone does it!) - and no consequence. In fact - another shock! - the more power and money an individual has in this country, the more allowances given for wrong behavior. A public apology is enough. No standards are set. Accountability and responsibility have become the exception and not the rule to those that govern and lead.

A point about Clinton being impeached came up and if this elected official is not held to the same standard, do we owe Clinton an apology? I'm still looking around for the consequence of the impeachment. So what apology would be necessary? Ouch, that slap on the hand stung! Please apologize.

I am not naive to believe our country will change it's view on this issue. In fact I think it will get worse. We are a nation of generational change. More & more unacceptable behavior is becoming the norm. But we shouldn't look around in dismay at the behavior of the younger generations. Disrespect, irresponsibility, lack of self control, alcoholism, drugs, lack of dependability, is growing among the young and this is a good example of why - they are being led by a group of people who conduct themselves in the very same way, with no personal OR societal accountability for their own personal life choices.

And speaking of Clinton - who probably is not the only president to be "untrue" - if the president can take advantage of his position of leader in this country with a young impressionable intern, without real consequence, then why would any politician care about being held to a standard of fidelity within their own marriage or committed relationship?

Intimacy in marriage usually is a prime life commitment. And I know there are plenty of reasons, excuses, life choices, etc etc etc, for straying. But, should a person decide and willingly commit to another person in the normal parameters of marriage, requesting in return a vow of faithfulness, (assuming this senator did not have an open marriage) - is that commitment not more important than a commitment to a nation?

Interesting question for debate.

I do think politicians ARE different from citizens and knowingly choose to put themselves into a career that expects a higher standard. They put themselves in the public limelight & usually they portray some sort of value systems to get elected. If they are married, they understand they choose to put their own family to the same scrutiny. Infidelity for any leader, public official, pastor, school teacher, any area the media can crucify - is a target. Not only for the offender but for their family. If an adult cannot have the self control to take that seriously and protect those in their own home, why are they going to retain self control in a high position of power over the citizens they are suppose to lead?

We push entertainment on our kids at every turn. And read article after article of the young - and some older - Hollywood stars who are repeatedly intoxicated or high, reports that are rarely associated with true consequences of the choices. A ticket here or there, maybe short jail time, stint in rehab - like it's part of normal life. I think the only story that really showed any consequence was Britney Spears, who lost her children but that was such a big story the media ate it up and ran it everywhere. Suspicion of sports figures who buy their way out of sentences, with the league's help so they can continue to play and put money in the owner's pockets.

I guess this is what I should teach our children. Power, wealth, financial stability, recognition IS the way to go because there you have it easy & can do what you want! No rules. No standards.

Hence... Enron, the banking industry, the stock market, the auto industry, AIG.

No accountability.